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Grilled Fillet

Grilled fillet is a staple for any restaurant. Make sure you know how to cook it properly.

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Chicken Breast

An overcooked chicken breast is never good. Getting it just right is the key to a great meal.

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King Crab

King crab is the best thing since sliced bread. But, it’s not found everywhere. So, when you do find it, make sure it’s going to taste great.

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Sea Trout

Sea trout can be amazing or it can hurt your stomach. It’s important you get this one cooked properly and avoid common pitfalls.

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Roasted Bakra

Crab legs are amazing, and can be cooked many different ways. It all depends on what you’re looking to do. We show you multiple ways to make this dish.

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Roasted Bakra

Not many people know about roasted bakra. If you want to show people how it’s done, you need to learn how to cook this dish.

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Japengo Sushi on the Boat Charter

If you ever want to experience what an upscale sushi restaurant on a boat charter might be like, head to La Jolla for Café Japengo.  If you miss eating at an airport sushi restaurant in anytown USA get yourself to Café Japengo for a fix.  If you want to see lots of people in suits chasing money and talking about sales with each other very loudly, yes, Café Japengo.  Dark, cheesily upscale but not, like a set piece from Mad Men 1987.

Not sure what kind of fish I got when ordering tuna sushi, it looked a bit like it was on its way out, like a jaggedly pulled piece of translucent tongue that a dog had yanked out of some dead animal’s mouth, and someone put on a piece of rice.  It tasted like chewy tap water.

Café Japengo is the kind of sushi restaurant that gives you a golf ball sized hunk of green horseradish because you need it to mask the flavor of their old fish.

The yellowtail was ok, I have to admit, it was not chewy like the tuna, and still tasted fresh, unlike the tuna, however, the tuna and the two rolls were pretty sick, I’m sorry to say.

Spicy tuna roll’s seaweed wrap tasted watery and was old, chewy and hard to bite, unlike fresh seaweed which in rolls evaporates under your teeth like heaven.

Sushi Ota is just down the road in Pacific Beach.  Why anyone would go to Café Japengo when Ota is so close is beyond me.

I thought I’d give it a shot, since it pretends to be fancy, is at the Hyatt, and has a large bar, however, it gave me a shot, in the stomach and the wallet, lunch jumps up and kicks you in the balls and yells “JAPENGO!”

A lunch should not cost $60, especially this lunch.

The place was packed with business people mid-week lunchtime, we waited and waited, the hostess was harried and ignored us standing at the counter while she counted a stack of menus frantically, then left, coming back to write something, then left again, a waiter nodded at me as he walked by with a tray of waters, then he left too.  The wait was 20 minutes for a table, but we could sit at the bar area, which was empty completely.  However, we sat there for another 15 minutes (alone in the bar) without anyone coming up to us.  I went and grabbed menus from the front counter.

Finally a very nice waiter came by.  He gave us a dish of water and two white tablets that looked like alka seltzer.  He said it was their special thing, you put the tablet in the water and it turns into a wet napkin, so “we wouldn’t have to go to the bathroom”.  The wet napkin trick looked like a tampon unfolding as it sat in the dish of water.  Our table remained foodless and drinkless for some time as I watched this feat of ingenuity.

The napkin looked like gauze.  I didn’t understand it.  Except maybe one of the suit-wearing idiots around me was likely a salesperson for this napkin in a pill thing, and duped the manager or someone into buying them and having them.

I wish it was alka seltzer and I could take them after my meal.  Or gauze to wrap my bleeding wallet in after getting bilked for $60 worth of junk sushi.

The food was gross.  I ate it because it was expensive.  I’m passive aggressive about everything too so did not complain while there, so here are my complaints.  Take them as you will.  All kinds of people love this place on yelp.

Sorry, really, Japengo, but actually I’m not sorry, you promised me so much, then just robbed me blind, leaving me in the sunlight with a feeling like I’ve been had.

Tasty Tacos on This Dinner Cruise

Tacos El Gordo is everywhere in South San Diego, even in Tijuana Baja California, even better there because of lax laws regarding taste?  It’s even in Las Vegas haha!

Someone told me the other day that Tuesday is also known as Taco Tuesday.  I was like – for reals?  Every Tuesday is taco tuesday?  They was all like – “naw G only at Miguel’s Cocina Old Town, I love those tacos, and every Tuesday they are like $3 for three (or $6 for 3?  something, I don’t care, go look it up)”

I was all like – you eat at Miguel’s and you are not a tourist?  Word.

Miguel’s is ok to take your Aunt from downstate New Jersey to show her “authentic” “Mexican” “food” – but otherwise steer clear.  They have an ok happy hour but their food be illin.  And Mexiblanco.  Extremely.

But no, I didn’t speak my mind to this aforementioned aficionado of blandiose taco de carnes viejos  I gave the homie his say and kept my hesistations to myself, then I ran as fast as I could to the border, or near it, to Tacos El Gordo National City.

This joint, besides maybe the homeboys who set up clandestine adobada shawarma things in alleyways along University in City Heights – wha just playin policeman haha go look somewhere else popo – is what San Diego has for tacos that are good good good and good.

 your tax dollars at work – cock blocking m’f’ers trying to get tacos shit you heard that
Tacos El Gordo has a long history south of the border as being some of the best tacos that Tijuana can shave up, at all hours and for cheap prices.  Nowadays Las Ahumadoras (Taco Street) and Tacos El Franc are better according to my last taxi driver, but El Gordo is always a good place to go for a steady flow of steamy salty meats and cilantro and salsas.
National City, like most El Gordo spots, is small, kind of 70’s hamburger joint feel inside with booths, and has different stations to order different types of tacos.
There was one old crazy (drunk? – prolly, even though it was 2pm on a Wednesday) man manning the station below some signs for tacos de cabeza (head), sudero (shoulder), lengua (tongue).  Go to him for those, make sure to be clear what you want.  My homie tried to order five tacos, all different, started with “cabeza” then got 5 tacos de cabeza haha.
shoulder sudero eat them bolero
Cabeza is maybe one of my least favorite tacos, it’s not that it’s because it’s head meat – though it is head meat, just that it’s less flavored in my opinion, than the other meats.
Tongue is chewy white boy, you heard that here first!
Shoulder tacos are some of my favorite.  They stew the meat a little, it’s very wet, and very very tasty like it’s been sitting in a broth of pig salt and onion basting and pork magical essences.  Get these dude and dudette.
There’s another guy or woman for the chorizo tacos, carne asada tacos and adobada tacos, just ask them don’t worry.  There were some worried people who only spoke English there, about to have a heart attack, don’t have a heart attack just ask them to try some meats for free, ask them where to go, etc.  They are very nice people.
oye mami damelo – chorizo
Chorizo is another favorite of mine, double up on your lipitor, it’s so salty and sausagey and pink and tender and blasting with flavor – the most intense of the tacos at the el gordo and the most anywhere usually.  One time I had soy chorizo from Trader Joes, soyrizo, it was so disgusting I spat out the bite and then threw up all over my house, then brushed my teeth and ran to Taco El Gordo for chorizo.
If you are vegetarian or vegan good for you I’m really happy, but make up your own food, why say soy dogs, soy burger, soyrizo, just make something like a new name that doesn’t have to deal with meat motherfuckaz.  Like blastipasche, or manifoldtetes, or slashoposhis.
You heard that.
Carne Asada is beef stupid.  Beef grilled up, tasty as shit, beefy, all that.
Adobada / Al Pastor – these are my favorites of favorites usually.  Sometimes you can get a meat tower that’s a bit old, been charred up without cutting, or new and raw – make sure you get adobada at the right time, when every other motherfucka is getting them – when there’s a line for them – when fucking smoke is pouring off the big round shawarma of pork – when the cutting man is sweating bullets all over the meat and his hands and not stopping cutting with his machete – when the pineapple on top is crying yellow tears all down the glistening cooking red meat – get them then!
adobada shawarma – sponge bob house on top
They are great, not as blasting with salt like chorizo, but tender, tasty, soury, bright, illuminating, sublime.
All this stuff is great, go there, get a pina colada blast too, get everything on your tacos – onion, cilantro, special sauce, everything, eat them all in once sitting, sneak in some beer, whatever.  Go stoned, amazing.  Get some extra napkins, bring some wet naps, lick that shit.
They are cheap.  They are good.  They are a constant staple in San Diego and Tijuana and Las Vegas.
Go there at 2:30 am, they are the best then.

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